Matt Lofy, The Dadass: this podcast we started two years ago has been a wild ride thus far. We’ve published over 80 episodes and special recordings so far, and we were super psyched and humbled to be awarded “podcast of the year" at the 2021 Columbus Podcast Awards last August.
Coming into 2022, Shaun (aka The Dude) and I started asking ourselves what’s next? How can we both grow our platform and challenge ourselves to do good in our community? How can we advocate for causes near to our hearts? Steve Michalovich, founder, CBUS Dads: Earlier this year, Matt looped me into the conversations Shaun and him were having, and I was incredibly excited and motivated to find even small ways to drive change and make impacts in our community with our combined platform. Matt: One major conversation we wanted to address was changing tables in men’s and gender-neutral restrooms. This idea came out of frustration on my son's second birthday at one of our favorite local places. I was out in the pouring rain changing his diaper in the back of my SUV. Kids or no kids, we've all been there where our decisions of what local business to support depends on if they're kid-friendly or not. Steve: I’ve of course experienced this same situation countless times, as this is not an uncommon gap many restaurants and other destinations have. In fact, I was stunned to learn that only 15 states have baby changing station accommodations legislation. So we started reaching out to our networks to see what organizations around town might be interested in trying to drive dialogue on this topic and collaborate on a campaign to help get more diaper changing tables into some of our favorite spots around town. Matt: Our outreach led us to the amazing, proudly female founders and operators of Pluie, a startup with the mission to modernize the outdated public restroom changing table experience and ensure all parents and caregivers on-the-go have access to a clean, safe and comfortable place to change their baby’s diaper. Steve: We were immediately blown away by their technology that is revolutionizing and disrupting a dated product. Pluie offers the world’s first and only self-sanitizing diaper changing table for public restrooms, powered by a patented UV-C light system, which is known to kill 99.9 percent of germs including influenza, e. Coli and, especially relevant today, coronavirus. Matt: Addie, Pulie’s founder, had a similar experience to mine involving a diaper blowout that inspired her to design and patent a better changing table. Through this kinship, we hit it off immediately! Steve: Since we started talking to the Pluie team, they’ve appeared on Good Morning America, and coincidentally, Columbus was a market they were looking to expand to. I’m super pumped for their trajectory and getting the opportunity to collaborate with them on this campaign. Matt: We had recently recorded with North High Brewing founder Tim Ward, and to say that I’m a fan of theirs would be an understatement. We approached Tim to see if we could install a Pluie in any of their local locations and host an event there. Him and the team of course obliged, so we will be celebrating the first Pluie installed in Columbus on Saturday, May 14 from 2-5 p.m. at their Dublin location. Steve: As if beer and celebrating this milestone which will hopefully be a catalyst for more changing tables across central Ohio isn’t enough, we will be collecting diapers and monetary donations to benefit Bottoms Up Diaper Bank during the event. We hope to see you there, and please consider making a donation to this incredible local institution! Matt: We envision this campaign as just the start for our Dadvocate platform, which we see representing our community impact arm of what we have created with The Dadass Podcast. Stay tuned for more ways we hope to #DadvocateForChange!
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No matter your personal views, the events unfolding in Ukraine impact all of us to some degree, and children are no different. War is not a novel concept in the world, but the stakes seem to be higher as two large countries are embroiled in a conflict that can potentially draw involvement from other nations as well. Many of us would like to think that we can shield our children from distressing and scary events in the world, but that is not the case. Kids hear and see things even if we try to shield them from it, especially as they get older. If you don't address it with them, they are left to process it themselves or turn to other unreliable sources. As of 2019, more than 50 percent of teens were getting their news primarily from social media. I can imagine that number has only gone up since then.
So, today I would like to share some advice on how to talk with the children in your lives about scary, violent or otherwise traumatic events they may be exposed to: Be proactive - don't wait for them to come to you
Reassure them in a realistic way
Leave the door open for further discussion
Encourage them to use emotion words and share your own feelings, appropriately
You don't have to know all the answers
Focus on who is trying to help
Avoid blaming or chastising entire groups of people
When you are able to have these conversations with the children in your life, it not only helps to work through the current issue and stress they may be experiencing. These talks will open the door for them to come to you with other questions and concerns they have to ensure that they get reliable and realistic information. It is incredibly important for children to have adults in their lives who model effective ways to discuss difficult issues, manage emotions and resolve conflict. These skills are crucial throughout life and contribute to resilience and overall success in life. A relatively short conversation now can have a ripple of positive effect throughout their development. This a guest post authored by Dr. Parker Huston, formerly the director of the Nationwide Children's Hospital On Our Sleeves campaign and now owner of Central Ohio Pediatric Behavioral Health. Check out his recent appearance on The Dadass Podcast. I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. My wife and I hardly acknowledge it. Not that we aren’t madly in love, have opposition to giving gifts or aren’t always looking for an excuse to have a date night. It just feels like a manufactured holiday conveniently located during a down time in the calendar. Bah Humbug!
Despite my personal indifference, I volunteered to plan my second grader’s class Valentine’s Day party. The PTA sent an email recruiting parents who would be willing to help, so I raised my hand. My motivation: my oldest hasn’t had a normal year of school yet due to the pandemic. In turn, we as parents haven’t had a normal year of parenting an elementary-aged child. Parents entering the school is not permitted, and most school events and field trips are still on hiatus. I saw planning the party as one small opportunity to feel connected to her day-to-day school life and helping in some small way. The PTA was explicit in that the party would only be 30 minutes, and I had a $25 budget to maneuver with. I put my thinking cap on and came up with two activities I pitched to her teacher via email: Complement Bingo I created 21 individual bingo boards with a subset of 30+ kid-appropriate compliments and affirmations. Fittingly, I purchased heart candies with messages for the kids to fill out their boards. School-approved candy and mechanical pencils were purchased for winning prizes. This was fun, because my daughter helped me in drafting the boards. Appreciation Wall I developed a template for students to write and/or draw something they appreciate about an assigned, random classmate for them to share and/or post in the classroom. While her teacher green-lit this concept, I’ve been told they didn’t get around to doing this activity [INSERT SHRUGGING EMOJI]. I don’t deserve a medal. Nothing I planned is overly novel or creative. But the feedback I received (opinion of one from my daughter) is that Bingo was a ton of fun for her and her classmates, and everyone loves mechanical pencils! This, plus efficiently only spending $11 of my allotted budget, I’ll take as wins. I’ve been told since the festivities by the lone male member of the PTA board that I was the first dad in the history of the elementary school to volunteer to help plan a party. Whether that’s true or not, I’m happy I contributed. Coincidentally, this week our home school district announced masking will be optional starting next week and volunteers can start coming back into the building again for the first time in two years. Not sure if this is my first or last class party I’ll plan, but fingers crossed for more normalcy for school-aged kids and the parents who want to be involved - even if it just means buying suckers and drafting bingo sheets. -Steven Michalovich, CBUS Dads contributor I know what many of you are probably saying under your breath or to the screen: "There's only so much of this I can take. We all have a breaking point!" It's true, you might have seen or read news stories lately about how some parents are "hitting bottom" or "reaching new lows" at this stage of the COVID-19 pandemic. We all have a reason, no matter who you are or where you live, to be experiencing this right now.
So, why talk about happiness? Right now?!? Turns out, happiness is not an achievement and isn't totally dependent upon on your situation or current life circumstances. The science of happiness has come a long way in the past few decades, so let's talk about why happiness is so important and how we can teach our kids, and ourselves, ways to cultivate happiness (yes, even now during the pandemic!). My favorite definition of happiness is "the experience of joy, contentment or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful and worthwhile.” This definition, by Sonja Lyubomirsky, captures both the experience in the moment and a long-term sense of life as a whole. What we're learning is that happiness is not the outcome of a process or success in a task. In fact, many people who study happiness now think that we have it backward, that greater success and achievement in life is a result of happiness instead of the cause. So, how can we help ourselves (and teach our kids) to cultivate positive emotions during tough times? Here are five strategies to try out at home:
This a guest post authored by Dr. Parker Huston, formerly the director of the Nationwide Children's Hospital On Our Sleeves campaign and now owner of Central Ohio Pediatric Behavioral Health. Check out his recent appearance on The Dadass Podcast. I like to think at 36 years old I’m still very healthy, but recently I’ve been reminded otherwise. It took surviving being snowed in with a two-year-old to learn that.
A large dose of humility came crashing down on poor ol’ me (and my back) over those frigid four days. As my back became sore from clearing our drive and those of some elderly neighbors, the time at home taught me I’m not the young buck I used to be. It was tempting to also allow the little guy to just watch every Bluey and Gigantisorous episode 24/7 just to keep our sanity. But during those days we also were able to learn and teach some valuable lessons.
So yeah, my back is strained a bit, but looking back at it shoveling those drives and increased hikeball (a.k.a football) in the living room was totally worth it. He still talks about shoveling and seeing me help push a car. Those are lessons he learned during a time not much was going on. That’s humbling as a parent, as much as realizing I’m not as young and strong as I used to be, but I’m ok with it. As Dr. Matthew Sowcik, a recent guest on our podcast said, “humility is….” I recommend you hear what else he shared about the power of humility at home and at work. It’s quite eye opening. Our son is two and is now at the age where he grasps onto ideas and family traditions. Unlike the previous holidays, this year he will actually remember what he got. My wife and I have already knocked out gifts for our son (and most of our family for that matter) just out of protest of the holiday hustle that brings out the chaos in all our lives.
As we gear up for long lines, increased traffic and nonstop Christmas consumerism, I’ve been reflecting on additional small, but meaningful gifts I could give our son this holiday season. It’s such an impactful list, I checked it twice and wanted to share it with you in hopes we could grow it:
As we enter this holiday gift giving season, I hope that you dads reading this are able to give the gift that keeps on giving to your children. Let’s keep this list growing. Please, comment below, and add to this list! “I have a ridiculously beautiful wife who's super sexy, and as long as she's happy with me, I don't need to look in the mirror and think, "How do I stack up next to Bradley Cooper? Would Cooper rock this shirt?" Doesn't matter. He does not have your wife. You do.”
-Nick Offerman If you have the privilege to have a significant other take this quote to heart for several reasons: For one, and I say this from personal experience, paying attention to each other is so important. Your partner matters and their opinion of you and your relationship absolutely matters. Second, your opinion of yourself and they way you talk about and to yourself absolutely matters. You are your toughest critic and the voice you hear the most is your own. Stop playing the comparison olympics, it benefits no one. Instead of asking how you stack up to some celebrity or even friend, try asking how you stack up against a previous version of yourself. Have you made the progress you wanted to make? There is no first place prize for living life, just try to be the best version of yourself and do your best everyday. That my friends is truly how to live like a DADASS! "...you've never been in the dark with a mosquito”
-Betty Reese Interesting things happen when you feel small. The world seems huge, and the tasks at hand often look like mountains despite them being mole hills. Here’s the thing though, a problem is a problem no matter the size. And everything plays into a larger narrative, we are in some ways all connected and feeling small has a way of showing you that. I’ve recently been watching Tiny World on Apple TV+ and loving it. For those unfamiliar, it is a nature documentary narrated by Paul Rudd and it explores the world through small creatures eyes and experiences. It’s amazing to watch and quite honestly a good watch for the entire family. What strikes me is how absolutely crucial the tiniest of things in our world are even to species much larger. Do not forget, the work that you do as an adult, co-worker, parent, or spouse ABSOLUTELY MATTERS no matter how small it seems. It's that time of year when everyone is looking for fall activities. My wife is seemingly a renowned expert on all of central Ohio's pumpkin patches, but a few weeks ago, we spent a morning at one we haven't visited before and that just happens to be close to our house. Somehow we had never made the trip.
Freeman's Farm certainly checks all of the boxes. We were able to select a pumpkin from a vast supply. We treated the animals in the petting pin to snacks, while we feasted on kettle corn and hot dogs. We opted for the 20-minute hayride through the wooded property, which didn't feel like it was adjacent to I-71. The market was well stocked, and the crowd wasn't huge. Maybe this is still one of the lesser known fall destinations in town? Either way, I highly recommend. That same Saturday, we spent our evening at Henmick Farm & Brewery. In my opinion, central Ohio has been in need of a destination like this for some time. For you city dwellers, it's definitely a hike but well worth the trip. Every beer I tried is delicious, and the space is what you'd expect: it's a farm. Copious seating around multiple fire pits (this was one of the first cool evenings of the fall) paired with plenty of open spaces for kids to play. Inside the Ohio State football game played, while an awesome bluegrass band played outside. They don't serve food, but we ordered takeout pizza from nearby Kilbourne Market and brought it in, which we were all surprisingly delighted by. If you're interested in visiting Henmick, I recommend checking out their Instagram first, as they do a great job sharing what activities (which include kids stuff) and entertainment they have lined up for the weekend ahead. All in all, it was a great fall Saturday in central Ohio spent with the family. Boy Meets World may be one of the greatest television series ever produced. Yes I said it, prove me wrong.
For our inaugural Tune-Up Tuesday, I have chosen one of my favorite lines ever written, which appeared in a classic episode of the show. At first glance, you may be confused, isn’t this series supposed to be uplifting? Yes, my dear friend it is, and it will be, just hold on. I want to point out that there is a nugget of positivity in the phrase: "life's tough, get a helmet." It is easy to find yourself buying into the lie that life has to be easy to be good. Tough times are not fun, but they are a part of life. They build character, resilience and uncover strengths you didn’t know you had. My dear friend, hold on, buckle up and get ready, because life is a crazy wild ride full of bumps, bruises, highs, and lows. Instead of wallowing in the negativity, find your helmet, and march on Dadass. |
AboutCBUS Dads is a community of central Ohio area dads balancing an active lifestyle with being an involved parent. A Saturday for us may involve enjoying morning t-ball, lunch at a new local spot and an evening at a summer festival with our families. We may live downtown, in the suburbs or somewhere between, but our common thread is that we continue to experience the community we love - now as parents. Archives
April 2024
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