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A community of
​central Ohio dads

Planning a Second Grade Holiday Party

2/18/2022

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I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. My wife and I hardly acknowledge it. Not that we aren’t madly in love, have opposition to giving gifts or aren’t always looking for an excuse to have a date night. It just feels like a manufactured holiday conveniently located during a down time in the calendar. Bah Humbug!

Despite my personal indifference, I volunteered to plan my second grader’s class Valentine’s Day party. The PTA sent an email recruiting parents who would be willing to help, so I raised my hand. 


My motivation: my oldest hasn’t had a normal year of school yet due to the pandemic. In turn, we as parents haven’t had a normal year of parenting an elementary-aged child. Parents entering the school is not permitted, and most school events and field trips are still on hiatus. I saw planning the party as one small opportunity to feel connected to her day-to-day school life and helping in some small way.


The PTA was explicit in that the party would only be 30 minutes, and I had a $25 budget to maneuver with. I put my thinking cap on and came up with two activities I pitched to her teacher via email:


Complement Bingo

I created 21 individual bingo boards with a subset of 30+ kid-appropriate compliments and affirmations. Fittingly, I purchased heart candies with messages for the kids to fill out their boards. School-approved candy and mechanical pencils were purchased for winning prizes. This was fun, because my daughter helped me in drafting the boards.


Appreciation Wall

I developed a template for students to write and/or draw something they appreciate about an assigned, random classmate for them to share and/or post in the classroom. While her teacher green-lit this concept, I’ve been told they didn’t get around to doing this activity [INSERT SHRUGGING EMOJI].


I don’t deserve a medal. Nothing I planned is overly novel or creative. But the feedback I received (opinion of one from my daughter) is that Bingo was a ton of fun for her and her classmates, and everyone loves mechanical pencils! This, plus efficiently only spending $11 of my allotted budget, I’ll take as wins.


I’ve been told since the festivities by the lone male member of the PTA board that I was the first dad in the history of the elementary school to volunteer to help plan a party. Whether that’s true or not, I’m happy I contributed.


Coincidentally, this week our home school district announced masking will be optional starting next week and volunteers can start coming back into the building again for the first time in two years. Not sure if this is my first or last class party I’ll plan, but fingers crossed for more normalcy for school-aged kids and the parents who want to be involved - even if it just means buying suckers and drafting bingo sheets.

-Steven Michalovich, CBUS Dads contributor


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OK Parents, Let's Talk About Happiness and Positivity!

2/15/2022

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I know what many of you are probably saying under your breath or to the screen: "There's only so much of this I can take. We all have a breaking point!" It's true, you might have seen or read news stories lately about how some parents are "hitting bottom" or "reaching new lows" at this stage of the COVID-19 pandemic. We all have a reason, no matter who you are or where you live, to be experiencing this right now.

So, why talk about happiness? Right now?!? Turns out, happiness is not an achievement and isn't totally dependent upon on your situation or current life circumstances. The science of happiness has come a long way in the past few decades, so let's talk about why happiness is so important and how we can teach our kids, and ourselves, ways to cultivate happiness (yes, even now during the pandemic!).

My favorite definition of happiness is "the experience of joy, contentment or positive well-being, combined with a sense that one’s life is good, meaningful and worthwhile.” This definition, by Sonja Lyubomirsky, captures both the experience in the moment and a long-term sense of life as a whole. What we're learning is that happiness is not the outcome of a process or success in a task. In fact, many people who study happiness now think that we have it backward, that greater success and achievement in life is a result of happiness instead of the cause.  

So, how can we help ourselves (and teach our kids) to cultivate positive emotions during tough times?  Here are five strategies to try out at home:

  1. Create and Maintain Strong Social Connections - Most of us know that friends and family are important to us, but I don't think we know just HOW important they are. Having at least a small handful of close friends, the kind you can call with a flat tire on the interstate or to share really important news and get the support you need, increases our sense of belonging and self-worth. The same goes for kids. Make sure they are maintaining friendships, even when it takes some extra effort on our part as parents. Put energy into your friendships and relationships. Don't take them for granted.
  2. Pay it Forward - Being kind to others actually improves our mood as well. Show the children in your life the power of kindness by doing something for a family member, friend, neighbor, or teacher. Have them join in or think of someone they would like to show kindness. It's a sure way to boost your mood today.  
  3. Practice Gratitude - No one could fault themselves for focusing on what's not going well in the world right now. But, when we spend so much time looking for the next let-down, we can miss all of the good things still going on in our lives. It's like staring up at the storm clouds when you're walking through a flower garden. The storm is real, but so are the flowers. Find time each day as a family to focus on what you are grateful for today. They can be big (the love of family and friends, accomplishments at work, etc.) or small (I look good in this sweater, or this is one of my favorite meals for dinner).
  4. Exercise - The connection between physical and mental health is very well established. Exercise helps to release certain endorphins in the brain which elevate your mood starting shortly after you finish exercising. You don't have to do a 500 calorie intense workout or run 10 miles to get the effect. 30 minutes of moderate exercise, like a brisk walk, jog, family bike ride, or anything else that gets your heart rate elevated, will help. Try this as a family activity and the effect will be even greater! Family yoga or exercise routines are easy to find online for free and work well in winter months if you're not up for a winter stroll.  
  5. Tell a Joke - There's a reason why a good comedy show, funny movie or hilarious joke can be just the thing to help when we are feeling down. Believe it or not, the simple act of smiling and laughing communicates to our brain that we should consider being happy right now. If not, why are we laughing? Telling silly jokes, watching a funny family-friendly show or just doing something that makes us smile will help to improve your mood! Thankfully The Dadass Podcast has plenty of dad jokes for you! 

This a guest post authored by Dr. Parker Huston, formerly the director of the Nationwide Children's Hospital On Our Sleeves campaign and now owner of Central Ohio Pediatric Behavioral Health. Check out his recent appearance on The Dadass Podcast.
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Snowed In with a Two Year Old and What We Learned

2/14/2022

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I like to think at 36 years old I’m still very healthy, but recently I’ve been reminded otherwise. It took surviving being snowed in with a two-year-old to learn that. 

A large dose of humility came crashing down on poor ol’ me (and my back) over those frigid four days. As my back became sore from clearing our drive and those of some elderly neighbors, the time at home taught me I’m not the young buck I used to be. It was tempting to also allow the little guy to just watch every Bluey and Gigantisorous episode 24/7 just to keep our sanity. But during those days we also were able to learn and teach some valuable lessons.
​
  • You can always teach new things: We’re in the phase where he wants to do everything with Daddy. During this time, he learned to shovel, and I learned how to clear snow for a second time, because he didn’t quite grasp the concept…but he learned. We taught him his middle name, along with our Mommy and Daddy names. Small teachings, but big moments. No matter your phase of fatherhood you’re able to have a significant impact in their development even while snowed in.
  • We all must do our part at home, and chores can be fun. My wife was gifted a new dust buster for Christmas, which really was a win for this guy. I love vacuuming and seeing those straight lines. It’s almost meditative to me, and I accept the fact that I’m weird. Now the little guy also likes to play with it too. So we began to tag team vacuuming the house. I use the Daddy vacuum and he uses “Tuck’s Vack-coom” where he gets the areas that my back won’t allow me to ben down to get. I’m no longer able to do it without him.
  • We’re never too busy to help a neighbor: While we were playing family hide and seek one evening, we noticed a neighbor stuck in our unplowed street outside our house. Naturally, I went out to help dig him from the icy clutches of the street and attempt to give him a push. It wasn’t until I came inside that I learned I had a watch party through the front window. He asked what Daddy was doing and my wife would tell him. For the rest of the night, he talked about me helping someone and how he wants to help people. A lesson he learned without me even knowing. The point is, we’re always teaching lessons as Dads whether we know it or not, especially that we always help a neighbor in need.

​So yeah, my back is strained a bit, but looking back at it shoveling those drives and increased hikeball (a.k.a football) in the living room was totally worth it. He still talks about shoveling and seeing me help push a car. Those are lessons he learned during a time not much was going on. That’s humbling as a parent, as much as realizing I’m not as young and strong as I used to be, but I’m ok with it. 

As Dr. Matthew Sowcik, a recent guest on our podcast said, “humility is….” I recommend you hear what else he shared about the power of humility at home and at work. It’s quite eye opening.
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    About

    CBUS Dads is a community of central Ohio area dads balancing an active lifestyle with being an involved parent. A Saturday for us may involve enjoying morning t-ball, lunch at a new local spot and an evening at a summer festival with our families. We may live downtown, in the suburbs or somewhere between, but our common thread is that we continue to experience the community we love - now as parents.

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